Let’s Get SURLY!

Okay, I have been wanting to write a doping rant for awhile, I mean really, what the hell kind of CAT 3 would dope?  Get a grip people, there are plenty of jobs out there that are much more pleasant and pay much better than being a pro bike racer representing a freaking candy company.

But I am not here to badger “athletes”, I am here to badger all things tradeshow.  Velonews, always ready to waste valuable electrons reporting on the latest and greatest in bottle opening or handlebar turning technology, have again captured the imagination of the e rider crowd with this shocking tell all article where they blow the lid clear off the festering toilet that is the market for stupid light and expensive bikes that are reported to be totally rideable.

Okay, who cares, whats the point, what do I want?  Fair question.  Do I want people to quit making bikes that weigh just 6 pounds?  No!  Do I want people to stop making bikes that reportedly cost $45,000?  NO!  Do I want people to quit buying them?  NO!  Do I want velonews to stop reporting on them?  Yes!  Do I want to read about the dumbass that bought such a bike breaking out all of their teeth / breaking their collarbone / being impaled upon splintered carbon parts when their stupid light bike implodes in the spectacular fashion that it is destined to?  No, well, yes, I do, but save it for the Darwin awards if those are still being handed out.  I can wait.

What I want, seriously, is for some stand up individual with a bike company sponsor, I am thinking SURLY would do nicely, to walk into that interbike booth with a 4130 steel tube that says KNOW WHEN TO SAY WHEN on it and a check for $45,000.  I want this person to hand over the check to the vendors, turn around and smash that 6 pound bike to smithereens, drop the steel tube on top of the pile and walk out.  And yes, I hope velonews is there to cover it.

Thanks for reading my waste of electrons, and keep it real out there.

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3 Responses so far »

  1. 1

    Ari said,

    G-pickle.
    The thing that most has called my attention is the rate of which “new Product” has been coming out. Some bikes don’t even get recognized by the consumer before it is stopped from being offered. Too much new, new all the time has just freakin’ dizzied the consumer to the point where they just don’t buy anything. Things are getting outdated way, way too fast. Thanks for getting my blood pressure up a notch.
    best to you,

    Ari

  2. 2

    Scott said,

    wow chill out. well, I did see someone report on the the new surly trailer. that’s pretty cool;

  3. 3

    Scott said,

    plus, I’ve had 3 flying double dog pale ales. did I really sign up for a 100 mile bike ride?


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